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Karolin Bathelt Blog Entry |
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March 8, 2024, 12:00:17 AM 3/8/24: r/SketchDaily theme, "Free Draw Friday." This week's character from my anthro WWII storyline is Karolin Bathelt. She's a new unwed mother who Lt. Paul Wozniak marries, both to satisfy her family and to help conceal a secret of his. There'll be more about her later in my art Tumblr and Toyhou.se. Regarding her design, she's a cream-colored poodle. I always imagined her with rather short blond hair that curls in at the bottom, though I'm unsure about her bangs. TUMBLR EDIT: All right, this is the character previously referred to as "New Mother," mainly in Paul Wozniak's entry. She obtained a name LITERALLY at the last minute, as I was submitting her drawing. Most of her involvement in the main plot is already given in Wozniak's entry, though I'll give a refresher. Karolin is a good decent Aryan girl from a good decent Aryan family. She meets an SS officer, the two hit it off, end up spending a few nights together. Karolin ends up pregnant. The two aren't married, but she's not too worried, surely he'd love to start a good decent Aryan family of his own, yes...? Turns out no. The officer hems and haws and makes excuses and promptly bows out. Dismayed, Karolin returns home with the news; it isn't great that she isn't married, but surely her parents would love a good decent Aryan grandchild anyway, yes...? Turns out no. Her family are devout Catholics, and Karolin's news leaves them aghast. No good daughter of theirs will be allowed back into the home with a bastard child, no matter how pure its blood. If she wants to return home, she'll need to get the problem taken care of somehow. Otherwise, she'll be raising the child on her own. Karolin has no savings of her own, no job, no means to get by. It's life under the Third Reich and most professions are closed to women, who are expected to stay home and raise families...with their husbands. She's pretty sure her parents were not advising her to get an abortion, but even if they were, that's illegal for decent Aryan women, again, the Third Reich wishes for women like her to have as many children as possible...with their husbands. There's almost no chance anyone would want to marry her now that she's already pregnant by somebody else. This leaves only one option, which breaks Karolin's heart, yet there's nothing else she can do. She packs a few things, including her personal papers. She has enough money to hire a taxi. The driver asks her, "Where to, schönes Fräulein?" Karolin lowers her head and mumbles simply, "Lebensborn, bitte." Karolin's heard of Lebensborn. Everyone has. The SS-run program was founded to boost the country's faltering birthrate through various means. Some of those means are...unorthodox. She's heard rumors of the arranged, anonymous meet-and-greets at isolated villas where SS men and suitable single women pair off for several nights before never meeting each other again. She's heard even darker rumors of the kidnapping of Aryan children from occupied countries, to be brought back to be raised as Germans. But she's also heard of the maternity homes, set up for unfortunate women just like her. No matter what the means, the Reich wants pureblooded children, and as long as she can prove both she and the father are racially acceptable, Lebensborn may help her where no one else will. She'll just have to give her child up for adoption, is all. She's never seen any Lebensborn facilities, has no idea where to even find one. Thus her vague request to the taxi driver. She hopes he doesn't get any lewd ideas and drive her off to one of those weird country villas. The driver peers back at her, sees the way her hands are folded over her belly, turns back around. "No problem, Liebe," he says, and pulls away from the curb. He drives Karolin out of the city. She anxiously watches the countryside opening up around her. After a time, the taxi turns up a long country drive and approaches a cluster of buildings. Karolin peers out the window, but sees no luxurious villa; there's a large house but it more closely resembles a quaint country inn with surrounding outbuildings. From here, she can see young women sitting in the shade, or walking around with nurses. Large banners hang from the front of the main building, one bearing the SS logo, the other a Lebensrune, the sign of Lebensborn. The taxi parks and the driver looks back at her. "Here we are, Liebe," he says. The driver is kind enough to help her with her bag, wishes her luck, and departs. Karolin heads inside the large house. There's a front hall where a woman in a nurse's uniform asks if she can help her. Karolin's voice falters, but again, she can't help but slide her hand protectively over herself. The nurse immediately understands, says gently, "Come, Liebe," and escorts her to an office. Here another, older woman in a dark dress, hair in a bun, a severe expression, greets her and starts asking for details, her name, her circumstances, why she's here, what she expects. Karolin haltingly tells her the relevant facts. The woman says they'll need information on her family, to determine the suitability of her ancestry; Karolin comes from good German stock, she says that'll be fine. The woman also, however, needs information on the child's father. Karolin falters--he wants no involvement in anything, how forthcoming would he be?--yet finally gives his name and rank. "An SS man...?" the woman inquires; when Karolin nods, she says, "Ah, most of the work should be done for us, then. His ancestry will already be in SS records, he couldn't have joined without providing it. All that's needed is his confirmation that he's the father." She tells Karolin to sit tight while they try to contact him over the telephone. Karolin does so, though she's miserable and full of dread. A long while passes as she grows more and more distressed; finally the woman returns, lets out a flustered sigh, then beams brightly at her. It was a long, frustrating game of phone tag trying to track down the officer and get hold of him, but at last they managed. He confirmed knowing Karolin. He confirmed her account of telling him she was pregnant. Most importantly, he confirmed the child is most likely his, as he can't imagine Karolin would have been involved with another man at the time, or would have lied to him. He might be a deadbeat, but he's honest. Karolin will need to undergo a physical and provide some further information, but for now, Lebensborn will take care of her. "You'll get everything you need," the woman promises, clasping her hands, "everything you need to bring forth the most perfect little baby. You'll make some good German couple happy and proud, Liebe. Making such a sacrifice for the Fatherland!" Karolin gets her own room; it's small, but nice, crisp, and clean. The private quarters and the common room where the expectant mothers mingle and rest are light and fresh and airy. There's simple, decent food, (SS-approved) books to read, games to play, and exercise, of course plenty of outdoor time and exercise, to ensure the women's good health and good healthy babies. What there isn't are the types of drugs often used when babies are delivered--"None of that nonsense!" the woman in charge of the home insists, "No awful drugs for our good, strong mothers. You'll do it the way your ancestors did, good clean births, pure births. It'll be difficult, ja, it'll hurt, but nothing good ever comes in life but some struggle is involved to obtain it! Your babies will be healthier and better off for it. And so will you. Struggle makes you stronger! Strong women and babies for the Reich! Sieg heil!" One of the other mothers-to-be, much further along than Karolin, leans toward her and mutters in her ear, "Bet this old cow's never pushed eight pounds of baby out of her nether regions before, else she'd be singing a completely different tune." Karolin settles into life at Lebensborn. It's decent and, as promised, she's well cared for...yet the further her pregnancy advances, the gloomier she grows. She's always wanted children. It's what she was always told was good. She really was fond of that SS man, feels she could have grown to love him, and thought he felt the same for her. She wants to keep this baby. She wants to get married and have a family. Giving her child away for some strangers to raise, never seeing it again, utterly dispirits her. This isn't the life she wanted. As time goes by, she finds she would even prefer to cut ties with her parents, deal with the stigma of being a single mother, if she only had the means to care for this child on her own. Yet it's simply not in the cards for her. Despite the nurses' urging that she cheer up for the good and the health of the baby, she becomes withdrawn and despondent, dwelling on the life that's been denied her. SS officials occasionally visit the maternity home, for tours, inspections, to make sure everything's running as it should be, whatever. The head nurse always welcomes them enthusiastically, and at times, attempts to coax them into chatting with the women (who she privately instructs to be on their best behavior, and to smile and bat their eyes at the officers, because "You never know, meine Lieben, who may be looking for a nice German bride!"). Most of the mothers-to-be follow this advice--it's only practical, after all. Even though catching an officer's eye could mean the opportunity to keep her baby, Karolin's heart isn't in it. Although the visiting officers are usually quite handsome and polite--she particularly notices one somewhat older one, "Herr Hesse," whom the head nurse presses especially hard to take his pick of one of the pretty young mothers, or else offer his services at one of the villas, suggestions which he always declines--Karolin isn't interested, in fact, she feels rather bitter at the sight of them. Once she has her child and has to tell it goodbye, she vows, she'll swear off men and marriage forever. If only just to spite her family, for this child not being good enough for them. The Third Reich is prey to various resistance efforts, and not even a maternity home is immune to threats, if it carries the SS banner. A visitor plants a bomb which explodes and takes a good portion of the main house with it. Fortunately, no lives are lost, yet there's lots of damage, and Karolin ends up trapped under the debris. When she hears somebody call out, "Is anyone in there--?" she cries, "Ja! Help me!!" A moment or so later, a young SS lieutenant appears, picking his way through the rubble; "Are you all right--?" he asks, to which Karolin exclaims, "I'm fine! I'm just stuck! Get me out!" The lieutenant tugs on a few boards, but they shift dangerously, making Karolin yell, "Careful! Careful!!" Finally he leans down and says, "I can lift it off you but only for a moment, you'll have to hurry and pull yourself out, ja--?" to which Karolin says, "Fine! Just do it!" He puts his shoulder under the beams pinning her legs and counts, "Eins, zwei, drei--!" and pushes up--Karolin scrabbles at the floor and pulls herself out from under it all, stumbling awkwardly to her feet, grabbing her unwieldy belly to try to regain her balance. The lieutenant pulls back as well just as the mass of rubble collapses with a crash. Then--Karolin lets out an awful wail. The lieutenant jumps and whirls around, eyes wide. "Are you hurt--?" he exclaims. "Nein!" Karolin cries, and a gout of water splashes against the floor beneath her. The lieutenant blinks, then says, "Oh." She expects the lieutenant to be utterly useless, yet he appears to know what he's doing; the delivery is fast and without incident or complication. When Lt. Hesse and several other officers arrive a bit later to search through the debris, they find Karolin seated near the rubble pile, panting and sweaty, a squirming infant against her chest, the other lieutenant squatting beside her; "Took you long enough!" the young lieutenant grouses at his surprised comrades. Karolin is seen to by a doctor, then taken to an SS hospital where the Lebensborn mothers are to stay until the maternity home can be repaired. She tries not to stare too much at her new child--a son, the lieutenant told her, though she hadn't wanted to know--as he nurses; she's to care for him a brief while until a suitable family can be found to adopt him. She hadn't even wanted to hold him, but it wasn't like she could've pushed him away when the lieutenant handed him over. She feels herself growing attached, and she knows this will only make it more difficult to give him up. As she's holding him one day, a nurse pops in to say, "You have a visitor." "Visitor...?" Karolin echoes, furrowing her brow--she doesn't know anybody. Says the nurse, "Ja, your fiancé," and steps back out before Karolin blurts out, "Fiancé--??" Then she blinks--the young lieutenant who'd delivered the baby appears and offers an awkward smile. Karolin: "Fiancé...?" Lieutenant: "I had to tell them I was family, it was the only way they'd let me in." Karolin: "What are you doing here?" Lieutenant: "I guess...I just wanted to see how you were doing. If everything's going well." Karolin: "I'm fine. Obviously." Lieutenant: "Well...that's good." *long pause* Karolin: "There's something else you want...?" Lieutenant: "Nein, just..." Karolin: *impatient* "What?" Lieutenant: "...Just wondering where your other visitors are." Karolin: "I don't have any." Lieutenant: "Obviously." Karolin: "Look. I'm grateful for all you did, despite how I acted. You don't need to bother yourself with me, though. I'm being cared for, I'll be fine. Danke for helping me when I needed it. You can go on with whatever it is you do, now." Lieutenant: *pause* "It's just...you have family, ja?" Karolin: "I'm sorry but what business is it of yours whether I have family or not--? Of course I have family. Not that I owe you any answers about my private life." Lieutenant: "I know it's not my business, it's just...odd to me that I had to pretend to be family to come in here, and I'm the only one there is. Your family should be with you now of all times, wouldn't you think?" Karolin: *bristling* "You don't know what I think. And how do you know they haven't already visited me--?" Lieutenant: "All right. Have they--?" *long silence; Karolin looks away* "They haven't...?" Karolin: "Go ahead and gloat." Lieutenant: *furrowing brow* "Why would I gloat?" Karolin: "For being right. You men love being right, ja...?" Lieutenant: *resigned look* "I take it the father hasn't visited either." Karolin: *defensive* "And why would you assume that--? For all you know--" Lieutenant: "Because I said I'm the fiancé, and they let me in. But also because it sounds like you have a grudge against a particular man. Likely a well-deserved grudge, considering that I'm here yet he's not." Karolin: "None of this is any of your business. And frankly it's weird for you to come here pretending to be my fiancé. I don't even have any idea who you are." Lieutenant: "Well then. Paul. Wozniak. I already got your name. Now we know each other." Karolin: *odd look* "Your name is 'Wozniak'...?" Lieutenant: "Long story." Karolin and Lt. Wozniak talk for a little bit, though she remains closed off at first, not wanting to go into detail about her poor choice of men. When the subject changes to the baby, however, and what her plans are following the adoption--for obviously, as an unwed mother in Lebensborn, this is the fate awaiting him--she lowers her head and draws in on herself even more. Wozniak notices her shift in mood, pauses, and finally asks, is this what she even really wants? Karolin snaps, "I'm giving up my child. Passing him along to Gott knows who to raise as their own, and I'll never see him again. Of course this isn't what I want. Yet what I want doesn't matter now, does it? You have any other asinine questions?" "So...why don't you keep him?" Wozniak asks, confused. "You speak your mind pretty well, you mouth off at me, I doubt you care much about anyone judging you. Sure, Lebensborn will be pissed off if you don't honor the arrangement, but what really can they do? He's your son, I doubt they'll force him away. Just take advantage of their hospitality for now, then take him with you when you go, and raise a fuss if they threaten you with anything, they'll back off." To which Karolin retorts, "Take him with me where--? I depend on my family, but they promised they'd disown me if I came back with him and no husband. I have no home of my own. No job, no more money. I can't afford to care for him all alone. I can either take him with me like you say and end up on the street and both of us starve...or I can give him up, and return to my family without him. I don't care about myself, but at least that way, he gets a chance." By now Karolin's voice cracks, and she has to stop talking and force herself not to burst into tears in front of this ignorant moron. There's a long uncomfortable silence, then Wozniak sits up straighter, and in a voice of resolve, says, "Well, marry me, then." Karolin: *brief silence* *disbelief* "What...?" Wozniak: "Marry me." *she stares at him* "You want to keep him, ja? And you need a husband to do so? Then marry me. Problem solved." *long silence* "Well...?" Karolin: *confused* "What are you even getting at--?" Wozniak: "Exactly as I said. What do you say...?" The rest of this exchange is HERE. Also here is Wozniak's reasoning, when Karolin asks why he would do something like this for a stranger, what would he possibly get out of it. Wozniak assures her his reasoning isn't ENTIRELY selfless...he, too, is expected to follow the norms and roles laid out by the Reich, and just as Karolin is meant to marry a man, settle down, and start a family, he's meant to marry a woman, settle down, and start a family. It's just Karolin's added complication that the father of her child isn't interested in marriage. Whereas it's just Wozniak's added complication that he isn't interested in marrying a woman. He isn't interested in women at all. Karolin's never met a homosexual before, at least, not to her knowledge. She's been taught, like everyone else in the Reich, that such people are perverted, degenerates, a threat to the lifeblood of the Fatherland. The male ones, in particular, are supposed to be effeminate, emasculated, ridiculous caricatures. Yet Wozniak is as normal as anyone she's ever seen, and he's even in the SS. How is all this possible? She finds herself more curious than disgusted. Wozniak informs her, "You've probably met a lot more of us than you think." The only way his life is possible is for him to either go underground, or effectively just pretend to be someone else. He says he's been doing the latter for so long that it's become second nature for him to lie about the personal details (just HOW long he's been lying about his true identity becomes clear later on). Karolin asks, "Are you lying to me, right now...?" Wozniak seems to choose his words carefully when he replies, "I'll be as honest with you as I can be, as long as you do the same." He insists that their situations aren't that different: He's only in the SS because his family desired it, and what does a good son do but what his parents request...? Karolin had been doubtful that he could possibly understand her situation, yet this knowledge hits her; she lowers her head again and murmurs sullenly, "Looks like you get it, I guess." Wozniak has to return to his job, but promises to visit again: "You haven't answered me yet, though I imagine this is the sort of question one might want to sleep on." As he gets up to leave, Karolin blurts out, "Why--?" He gives her a questioning look. "Why really would you do this for me?" she insists. "What really are you asking of me? What really do I have to offer you?" Wozniak looks at her for a moment before lifting a shoulder and replying, simply, "My life." Karolin spends a long lonely night mulling this over. Her son is taken away to let her get some sleep which she does not get. Her son is brought back for her to nurse. She looks down at him as he suckles and feels a stab in her heart. Realizes, that moment, that she would do anything for him, and she would rather go down fighting than give him up. She hadn't understood Wozniak's response that what she had to offer him was his life. Wouldn't he be alive and just fine without her? She thinks of a life without her son, and realizes now the meaning of those two words. Without her son, she might be alive, but that wouldn't be a life. Wozniak is offering her her life, and her son's, in exchange for his. She knows she can't wait or she'll burst. A nurse stops by and she says, "Could you call Herr Woz...Paul Wozniak? My--my fiancé." The hospital staff have to do a little calling around before getting connected to Wozniak's office, since they don't know where he works, the SS is a huge organization and not especially well known for their orderly departments and chain of command. One of the hospital staff expresses some doubt, how does Karolin not know where her own fiancé works? Karolin racks her brain a bit desperately before stammering, "They're...they're very secretive, why would they tell me everything about his work?" To her relief, Wozniak breathlessly arrives just then--"Sorry, came as quickly as I could"--then when the staff member says, "I was just asking your...fiancée...how it is she doesn't know what department you work in," he retorts, "My own family don't know half of what I do, you think I should announce all my work activities to the world--?" The staff member departs, chastened; Wozniak takes a chair and says, "For future reference, I'm in the security and intelligence division." "So what you just said is true...?" Karolin asks; Wozniak shrugs and says, "I have to tell the truth sometimes. Statistically speaking." He assumes she has a reason for calling him, rather than waiting for his arrival. "You've thought it over...?" he inquires, "My offer...?" to which Karolin takes a steadying breath, squares her shoulders, and says, "I...I accept your proposition, but there have to be some rules." She lays them out: They're merely to pretend to be husband and wife. Though obviously they need to go through the legal procedures to make it genuine, this will be just for show. They'll play the devoted couple in public, satisfy their families' and the SS's stipulations, yet behind closed doors, it'll be different. They'll need to share a bed but there'll be no touching, no kissing, no romantic or physical activities of any sort. She'll let him do his things and he'll let her do hers. And while he'll legally be named as her son's father on paper, any decisions regarding his upbringing will be hers alone. In return she won't interfere in any activities he himself decides to engage in. Wozniak listens to her guidelines, though this last one, tossed out a bit hastily at the last moment, makes him raise an eyebrow: "What exactly do you think I get up to in my spare time...?" he asks, sounding more amused than anything. Karolin stammers again uncertainly, turning red; he starts laughing at her discomfort. "I don't go out and engage in orgies at every turn, I assure you. I couldn't even tell you where one finds an orgy to participate in." "I'm not saying that," Karolin insists, "just...if you choose to go out...and find anyone to spend some time with...I wouldn't say anything about it." The discussion rapidly goes downhill from there. Wozniak: "Seriously!--what do you think I do every minute I'm not working or visiting you--? Do you just assume I drag home a different man every night?" Karolin: "I don't know! I don't know anything about you! All I'm saying is I won't get in the way of whatever it is you choose to do in your spare time, is that so awful--?" Wozniak: "Tell me, what do you do in YOUR spare time--? Do you go out with men every night? Every weekend?" Karolin: *blushing* "That's none of your business! But just for the sake of argument, nein I don't do that, that's not at all what I'm interested in! All I want is to have a family! A normal loving family!" Wozniak: "And that's all I want, too. You see how this works? I told you we're not so different. Not that it's any of YOUR business, but nein, I'm not interested in going out with men every night, every weekend. I'm not interested in going out with them at all. If it were possible, if it could be done somehow, I'd like just settling down with one man I love and having a family. All this sleeping around nonsense isn't me. It never has been." Karolin: *furrowing brow* "Wait...are you saying...?" Wozniak: "Ja, I'm saying. I've never been with a man before. Hasn't happened. Certainly not every night, every weekend. Not that it's any of your business." Karolin: "But...how can you know, how can you be sure what you're interested in, then? If you've never..." Wozniak: "Have you ever been with a woman--?" Karolin: "What--? Nein! Of course not! Why would you even--" Wozniak: "Well, how then can you be sure--?" *Karolin falls silent, steams* "Exactly. Some things, you just know, and you don't have to question. And anyway, in regards to your guidelines, you needn't worry too much about me trying anything inappropriate. The same as I'm not interested in going to bed with a different man every night, I'm not interested in that either. It does beg the question, though." Karolin: "What question?" Wozniak: "I'm just wondering what you'd say if I had some stipulations of my own. Like, say, what if I had you promise to keep your hands to yourself?" Karolin: "You just said you aren't even interested!" Wozniak: "Or if I promised to allow you the freedom to go off with men whenever you like, out of the kindness of my heart." Karolin: *temper flaring* "I just told you! I want a decent husband and a decent family! I'm not interested in just going to bed with some random man!" Wozniak: "And yet you did just that. And now here you are, ja...?" The moment the words leave Wozniak's mouth, they hit Karolin like a ton of bricks; she's struck mute, staring at him, her lungs feeling like they've turned inside out. Likewise, the moment the words leave Wozniak's mouth, she can tell he immediately regrets them--a stricken look flits across his face and he sucks in a breath. "I'm sorry," he says as she lowers her head, her face burning. "I'm sorry, it just came out. I didn't think. I'm--look. I'll--I'll go," he says, hurriedly standing up and taking a step back. "I'm sorry," he adds once more, turning. "Wait," Karolin murmurs without lifting her head, and he pauses. It's a moment before she finds her voice. Karolin: "You're right." Wozniak: "Nein, I'm not. That was awful of me to say. I--" Karolin: "Ja...you are. That's exactly what I did and why I'm here. *pause* I'm sorry I assumed. About you. When I said you're terrible at this...I'm terrible at it too. *long pause* I'm not good at asking for help. *voice cracks* Especially when I need it most." *long pause* *Wozniak sits* Wozniak: "That's rather why I offered, first...so you wouldn't have to ask." Karolin: *long pause* "What you offered. You still mean it?...after everything I said?" Wozniak: "Of course I do. I have thick skin, don't worry about me." Karolin: "Those stupid rules...forget I said them. I know you wouldn't try anything you shouldn't. Just...promise me one thing?" *looks up at him* "Promise me no matter how things turn out, you'll keep him safe?" *they both look at the baby* "No matter what mistakes I made he's the world to me. I don't care about anything else. You said I'd be offering you your life...can you promise you'll protect his...?" Wozniak: *pause* "I promise I'll do everything in my power to keep both you and him safe." Karolin stares at Wozniak long and hard; despite his self-professed propensity for lying, his eyes now are honest. She swallows, draws her son close, and nods. "Then...ja," she murmurs, "my answer is ja." Much of the rest is told in Wozniak's entry. The two make plans for what's involved next--seeking the blessing of Karolin's parents (they're stunned, but overjoyed, although they do rebuke Wozniak for being a reluctant father to start), informing Wozniak's parents (they're just stunned...they had no idea he was even involved with anyone, because well, he wasn't, but still), then finally, applying for the permission of the SS itself, which has to approve all SS marriages as fitting their strict guidelines. Wozniak has already met all the requirements, having served in both the Waffen-SS and the Allgemeine-SS; and Karolin has met enough requirements to obtain the aid of Lebensborn, meaning both she and her child are considered racially acceptable. So it doesn't take long at all for the SS to agree to the marriage. Karolin and Wozniak are wed, and the baby is christened, in odd SS ceremonies with daggers and occult symbolism and quotes from Mein Kampf and all that. Karolin gives the child the name Paul: "Seems appropriate he should be named after his father," she murmurs at Wozniak's surprised look. I don't need to rehash in detail the info already given in Wozniak's entry. He and Karolin succeed in fooling everyone about the legitimacy of their marriage (a few people, such as Hesse and some Lebensborn authorities, know he's not the father of Karolin's son, yet this is the extent of their knowledge of the deceit, and really, it's a trivial matter), largely because they're both so skilled at pretending to be a devoted couple. Part of this stems from the fact that Karolin develops feelings for Wozniak, despite knowing he can never feel the same way about her. She still wonders if it's possible for him to know for sure. She even goes so far as to kiss him, rather passionately, after which she asks him, "Anything...?" To which Wozniak shakes his head and says, simply, "Nothing." There's a note of regret in his voice...she can tell that he wishes he could be the sort of husband she wants, but the best he can do is be the husband she needs. The little makeshift family flees for the border as the city falls to the Allies. Wozniak passes into Poland to obtain papers from a cousin--he's given a new identity as Piotr Wozniak, with Karolin and the baby receiving new names as well. Karolin is stunned to learn that the names are those of more relatives of Wozniak's who died in the SS-run camps. Wozniak had explained his odd name to her once, that while he'd been born in Poland, his parents were ethnic Germans, named Woschnagg, who had moved to Poland and modified their surname to fit in better with the local population, keeping the spelling when they returned to Germany. The truth is that Woschnagg is the alias--Wozniak and his entire family are indeed ethnic Poles. None of them are German at all. While most parties are unaware (Wozniak thinks Hesse suspected, but said nothing), certain authorities in the SS had full knowledge of Wozniak's Slavic ethnicity; his parents' money went a long way toward smoothing over the process of him joining the SS. "Even the mighty SS has a price it can be bought for," he tells Karolin. The cousin who just helped him is understandably hostile for Wozniak's family abandoning the rest of them, and threatens him never to come see him again, so the three are effectively cut off and left on their own. Wozniak builds a small cabin deep in the woods for them to live in until things have settled down, and they remain there for a few years, until a former camp prisoner comes looking for Wozniak with vengeance on his mind. Karolin is left alone to tearfully bundle up Wozniak's body and pull him back to the cabin where little Paul is waiting. Karolin cuddles the child and weeps for a long while as the shadows grow long. By sunrise, she's decided. She'll make the trek back into Poland to try to find and enlist aid from his cousin once more. The very least she can do in return for Wozniak keeping his promise to keep her--their--son safe is to make sure he's buried in consecrated ground. Karolin dries her tears, dresses Paul--whom Wozniak had lovingly called Pawel--in his warmest clothes, and packs the sled which is their only means of transportation--food and necessities, along with Wozniak's body. She locks up the cabin, slips into the harness, and off they go. She trudges through drifts of snow, Pawel dozing packed snugly beside his father and between the supplies on the sled, and tries not to cry too hard every time she's overwhelmed by the grief; she genuinely loved Wozniak, and can't help but think he loved her too, even if he couldn't love her that way. Every time she'd voiced her guilt over keeping him from living his own life, he'd told her this was his life. Every time she'd asked if he ever regretted marrying her, he'd insisted that he didn't regret a thing. Aside from that one incompatibility, he was every bit the devoted husband and father she'd always wished to be married to. She never was sure of his religious beliefs--he'd vaguely mentioned a God, once or twice, but never seemed especially concerned with the matter, and never spoke of church--yet she believes, because she feels like she has to believe there's something better waiting. As she passes from German forests into Polish ones she steels herself to have to beg and plead if need be. Wozniak and his cousin did not part on good terms, and she prepares to have to do whatever she can for this one request. The border here has long been unguarded, untended, rather easily crossed, especially in these turbulent times, though one still needs to be cautious. Karolin trudges along, cold, weary, yet undisturbed. The land starts to look familiar. She has only her memory of that one long-ago trip to depend on. When she reaches the first little clusters of cottages, she knocks at one and asks where she can find the Wozniaks. (Wozniak had thought it important enough to teach her the basics of the language while he was alive.) It's an unfortunately common name, as she soon discovers, yet she manages to narrow down her request, and is finally pointed in the right direction. She reaches the home in question and knocks; a woman answers the door. They had directly interacted with Wozniak's male cousin previously, though a woman Karolin had assumed was his wife had remained in the background at the time. She recognizes Karolin, as her eyes go wide; she doesn't argue when Karolin asks for Wozniak's cousin, just goes and fetches him. He's livid before he even reaches the door, hissing in her face, "I warned you never to show your miserable face here again!" It takes him a moment to realize Karolin and Pawel are on their own, and when she haltingly informs him of Wozniak's death, he's struck mute. He's still reluctant to have anything to do with her; it's his wife who insists they let the two in, at least to rest a little while, and say why they're here. The cousin is adamant that he has no more help to offer her--he made that much clear the last time--and says if they need food, money, shelter, they'll need to look elsewhere. Karolin replies that she doesn't want any of those things. All she wants is a proper burial for Wozniak: "For the sacrifice he made for Pawel and me," she explains. "Bitte...proszę...help me with this one thing, and you'll never see us again. I promise." Cousin doesn't agree, but Karolin can tell that he's wavering. He'd obviously expected her to ask for a handout, and for her to ask for this instead catches him off guard. Looking over her shoulder at little Pawel seated beside Wozniak's body on the sled seems to make him even more uncertain. "Come inside," his wife finally says; he starts to protest, but she shushes him. "They came this far all alone, for this one thing. The least we can do is let them rest a bit. No matter what he or his parents did, they're still family." She touches Karolin's arm. "Fetch your son. My husband will see to Paul. Come inside and sit a while. We'll figure it out, tak...?" Karolin murmurs thank yous as she picks up Pawel, and Wozniak's cousin reluctantly takes the sled. His wife settles her in the parlor with warm milk and biscuits for both. Karolin tells her what happened to the best of her ability (she has no idea what the murderer's relationship with Wozniak was, so can't explain that), the cousin rejoining them in time to learn the secret Wozniak kept his entire life; he's surprised by it, his wife, not so much: "We all knew each other when we were young...I just always had a feeling." For him to have forfeited his own chance at a relationship awes her; her husband seems struck most by the fact that he died defending Karolin, and a child who wasn't even his son. He tersely says they'll contact the proper authorities, see to it that Wozniak is buried right, in a churchyard, by family. He then offers to fix up a room for Karolin and Pawel to stay in--"It isn't much, but it's what we have." When the women look at him, he doesn't look back, but mumbles, "Sounds like he tried doing one good thing...I dunno...I figure, we've lost enough already, abandoning even more family isn't the solution now. And it looks like he considered you two family. Which means you're ours, too." Karolin blinks, then her eyes fill with tears. "Dan...Dzięki," she murmurs, before her words fail her, and she hugs Pawel close. [Karolin Bathelt 2024 [Friday, March 8, 2024, 12:00:17 AM]] |