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Luck O' The Irish: Front Material/Chapter 1 |
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Luck O' The Irish Morning AS WAS USUAL, the halls of Little Rock University were crowded to the gills. It was Homecoming, and the LRU Pegasi were playing against the U of M Wolverines. And, also as usual, everyone was going nuts. "U of M! U of M!" Chernobyl Cat shrieked hysterically. "We'll be massacred! We'll be torn to shreds! Everyone knows that LRU stands no chance against U of M!" "Aw, shaddap!" Amy snapped, spraying her hair and also temporarily blinding a coed behind her. [Per Note: I erroneously thought back then that "coed" could refer to either a male or female student.] "Yeah, Chobe, don't worry," Damien said, reaching for his geometry book. "Be happy!" Phemie, whose real name was Euphemia Bianca, exclaimed. Amy made a gagging motion as she closed her locker and headed off for her first hour history class. [Per Note: My only experience with college was community college. This story was likely written when I was in high school, so my understanding of college basics was nonexistent--I assumed they had lockers and class hours like high school did.] "Dami, how many minutos till the bell rings?" Choby asked. [Per Note: In light print, with an arrow pointing to "minutos," I have written, "slant?"--I was wondering if I should italicize it because it's a foreign word.] Damien grabbed a passing student by the arm and consulted his watch. "Five minutes to the mercy bell," he said. "You've got nine minutes, Chobe. Why?" "Nine? Great!" Choby said. "I've gotta see Ritzie. Should he be at--" "The Step Fountains!" everyone within earshot exclaimed. "Okay! I ain't deef!" Choby spat, and dashed for the nearest exit. Ritzie O'Brien was, as he always was during first hour (or at least part of first hour), at the Step Fountains. Chernobyl headed towards the huge light-colored Steps, very short but very wide, which led to an entrance in the museum. Two rectangular fountain pools flanked the Steps, wide arcs of pale blue water spraying into the air but not beyond the stone enclosing the pools. Ritzie was sitting on, instead of his usual seat at the right fountain, the Steps themselves, writing in a notebook. He seemed too preoccupied to notice Choby. "Ritzie!" Choby gasped, stopping to catch his breath. Ritzie glanced up. "Oh, hi, Chobe!" he greeted. "What's up?" "I--I need to--know--whew!--which tea--team division I'm on. For the Olympiad this weekend." "I'm surprised someone remembered that," Ritzie said, shuffling through some papers. "What with all this U of M Homecoming junk goin' on." "Yeah," Choby said. It wasn't much to say, but then again, Choby wasn't good with words, unless they were weird or made no sense. "Here we go!" Ritzie said, pulling out a list. Ritzie kept plenty of lists, since he was the leader of the Student Assistance Committee. Most newcomers to LRU were bewildered at the thought of a committee of students to help students, but it came in handy to almost everyone. The second in charge was, of course, Phemie the good-natured [sic], who never got mad, never got jealous, never seemed to get anything but happier. "Let's seeeee," Ritzie murmured, bouncing his pen between his teeth. "Bla, bla, bla, bla, bla...ah-haaa! Heerrree you arrre. You're on Team A." "Team A? What's that?" "Color brown. The Flying Dutchmen." "The Flying Dutchmen?" A nod. "Where the heck did they come up with that?" "Levie Cox at a conference. He said the captain called him up on his old Singer sewing machine and asked him how he was doin'. Psyche Cooper backed him up a hundred percent. [Per Note: Levie was supposed to be schizophrenic. As for Psyche, you can meet her in Minot. She's not crazy, but she's openminded.] Rather catchy name for a team, though." "Yeah, catchy, alright [sic]. We're named after a fabled ghost ship. Aw, c'mon!" "Things could be worse. You could be on Team H, the Quaggas, or Team I, the Komodo Dragons--" "I hate this place!" Choby muttered. "Whatta they name the freshmen? The Donkeys. I'm a Donkey!" Ritzie nodded sympathetically. Every year the seniors at LRU gave an insulting name to the freshmen, which would go down with them in university history. So far the college had Donkeys, Vultures, Amoebas, and Jellyfish. [Per Note: I got this idea from my high school. I came from the class of Weasels. We got off easy.] Choby, Ritzie, and most of their close friends had turned sophomore that year; the seniors had waited until September to name them, so they had gone through a year of sheer worrying which had finally led to the desire to let out a long, loud bray. The new sophomores felt like kicking the seniors, some of whom were staying at the college longer than four years, just to torment the lower classmen to tears or insanity, whichever came first, though it was almost certain they had already gone long past the latter. "Speaking of names," Choby said, "what about this year's freshmen? Hear any rumors?" Ritzie nodded. "Really? How sure are ya?" "At least eighty percent." "What'll it be?" Ritzie leaned forward. "What's black and white and stinky all over?" Choby's eyes widened. "You don't mean--!" "Only fella that'd dare eat one is an owl." "Ooooooo, eeeewwww! They're gonna be the Skunks?" "Who said anything about skunks? I meant a teeny North American zebra with a gas problem." "Oh, shut up!" Choby laughed. "I gotta go now. Catch ya later!" |